Truth Magazine

By Jeff Kepler

At a dance, the focus is on the other person’s body, how it looks and how it moves. The movements are sexual, the tone is sexual, and the atmosphere is of sexual stimulation.

Dancing Defined

In a time where million dollar words and fancy arguing are supposed to be the keys to successful persuasion, let me spare you the time. All I want to do is give you facts. These may be facts that you might already know, and if this is the case, I would like to “stir you up by way of reminder” (2 Pet. 1:13; 13:1). If these are new facts to you, I’m glad you are reading this now. They are simple facts  facts that are undisputed. Facts that you can hold on to as truth. Besides, after you wipe away all the big words and fancy talk, all you have are facts anyway.

When talking about dancing, you must know there are different types of dances. This article will not address all types of dancing. Why? Because you can’t lump all dances under the heading of dancing and talk about them the same. There are different kinds. Folk dances, a dance for joy, dances mentioned in the Old Testament, ball-room dancing, the modern dance, square dancing, and I guess even round dancing. By saying this I do not mean that I approve of these, but we need to know that each case of dancing needs to be dealt with by itself. In this article we will be discussing the modem dance.

You will find the modem dance in many places. It is this very dance that is offered by our school systems, all the way from kindergarten to high school, on such occasions as Home-coming, Valentine’s Day, and Prom. Anytime during this article when I mention dance or dancing, I am refer-ring to this particular dance. This dance involves close physical contact of the parties involved, as well as gyration movements. This dance is associated with rock, punk, new age, heavy metal, hip hop, R&B, and rap music. The movements of this dance are wild gyrations and explicit sexual movements with sexual overtones. Much of the music involved in this dance has sexual language and suggestions as well.

This modern dance is defined in the following way: (1) consists in rhythmical movement of any or all parts of the body in accordance with some type of emotion or idea (the focus is on the body). (2) Movements of the body, creating an infectious response, the two-way process of motion and (sexual) emotion. This dance has a purpose.

Let’s Go to a Dance

Let’s take a factual look at this dance as is offered by our schools. Dads, Moms, I want you to think about your beautiful daughter God has blessed you with. As she goes to the dance, your daughter’s body will be the main focus as she is on the dance floor. The boys will be looking at your daughter’s body and watching how she moves it and how she gyrates it to music. The boy dancing with her or across the room is being stimulated by how your daughter is moving her body and, most likely adding to that, what she is wearing. As she moves her body around and as the boys look at her body, she is expressing the desire for others to look at her and enjoy what they see as she moves around. Also during this dance, your daughter is focusing on the boy’s body and how he is moving and gyrating it in front of her. Dads, Moms, I want you to think about your wonderful son God has blessed you with. Yes, he is one of the “boys” mentioned above if he at-tends this dance. Your son is watching a girl’s body as she moves it and gyrates it to music. As your son is focusing on her body, your son is immediately turned on sexually. His sexual desire has been ignited and the movements of a girl’s body feeds this lustful reaction. He then in turn moves his body around for her to see. You see, at a dance, the focus is on the other person’s body, how it looks and how it moves. The movements are sexual, the tone is sexual, and the atmosphere is of sexual stimulation. Bodies close, touching, rubbing together  stimulating sexual thoughts and desires.

What is the Purpose?

What is the purpose of the modern dance, the one so popular among our young people? Can it be for harmless fun and exercise? Some use this as a defense. During the slow periods of dance, with two people rubbing their bodies together, is this exercise? No. If it was exercise that was needed during the Homecoming or Prom, wouldn’t it be just the same if you had all of the students get together for an hour or two of a gym class? I think not. So much for exercise. Can it be just because “it’s what you do now”? Is it just because it’s the “in” thing? Schools use these ideas as their reasoning to have a dance because they want to get the kids together in a social atmosphere, but it is not the purpose of the dance itself. What is the answer? What is the purpose of this dance? Well, the purpose of this dance can be seen in its origin. It had its be-ginning in brothels and road houses where prostitutes work. This dance was originally known as the “art of seducers.” Prostitutes did and still do use this dance to sexually stimulate the one who is paying her to have sex. It is the entrance to fornication. This is the purpose of this dance. To lead to fornication. Read the following quotes from those that use and promote this type of dancing. “Dancing’s charm is based on sex appeal”; “Dancing is used as a doorway to sex. You must first arouse the desires then you fulfill them …”; “Dancing is the easiest and surest way to turn on a boy.” All of those that I have seen that describe this dance, that teach this dance, that pro-mote this dance in their establishments, do so using a common word. That word is sex.

Ladies and gentlemen, brothers and sisters, there you have it. Our children are being pressured in being involved with an activity that is sexually driven. Our school officials can deny it, and say that it is good clean fun, but in reality, and according to the facts, it is dirty not clean. They may not mean for this to be the purpose, but it is. Facts are facts. When your son and/or daughter goes to a dance, they are associating with sexual sins and prostitutes. Do you want your daughter to be a prostitute for the boys she goes to school with? Do you want boys to think of her as a girl of sexual per-version?

Our God Speaks

There is a word that God himself uses and he says that anyone guilty of it will burn in everlasting hell. The word is lasciviousness. (Some versions use the word sensuality or lewdness. Definitions apply to all.) We better know what the word means because God uses it. This word can be seen within Scripture (Mark 7:21-22; 2 Cor. 12:20-21; Gal. 5:19; 1 Pet. 4:3). The word means: “Absence of restraint, in-decency, wantonness, lust, excess wanton desires, indecent bodily movements, unchaste handling of males and females, tending to produce lewd emotions, shamelessness, exciting sexual desires, one that has a characteristic of lust.” That definition really, really sounds familiar doesn’t it? Where did we see those same words? Yes, you are right in the definition of dancing. The same words that define lasciviousness define dance. If the dance we are talking about does not involve “indecent bodily movements, or unchaste handling of males and females, or exciting sexual desires” it would be beyond my mind to know what is. The fact is, these two, dancing and lasciviousness are the same thing! Now really read Galatians 5:19. Go on, read it. Putting everything together now, we have this formula: Dancing = Lasciviousness and lasciviousness = will not inherit the kingdom of God (death in hell). You see the “good clean fun” has now turned into the loss of a soul. The Lord has spoken. We better listen. God says if you are involved in lasciviousness, you will lose your soul in hell. Dancing is a sin against God and punishable by death.

We have to face these facts. You can’t say “I disagree with you, Jeff.” I haven’t said anything. I have just given you undisputed facts. You can’t change the facts. But I fear you’ll try. You might disagree with what you have read. You might be mad. You might not even care. But that doesn’t change it. I fear you will lose your soul, and possibly cause your child to lose his soul out of your failure to teach them God’s word on this matter because you want to do what you want and you want to have fun, or you want your kid to have fun. God sees it different, and the only way you or I will get in heaven is if we act and think like our Father.

An Exercise

If you are still not convinced, do the following exercise. Look up the following verses and as you read each one, look back at the definition of dancing. How does it hold up to the will of your God? It’s the word you will be judged by against what man has to offer.

Dancing

Wild Gyrations  Explicit Sexual Movements and Over-tones  Focusing On The Body  Sex Appeal  Arousing Desires  Sexual Stimulation (Matt. 5:27-28; Rom. 14:21; 1 Tim. 1:16; 1 Thess. 5:21-22; 1 Cor. 8:12-13; Jas. 4:4; Eph. 5:11; Rom. 12:9; 13:13-14; Matt. 18:5-7; 1 Pet. 4:1-19; Matt. 7:16-20; 1 Cor. 15:33; 2 Tim. 2:2; 1 Tim. 2:9; 1 Cor. 6:18-20; 1 Pet. 3:1-2; Matt. 6:13; 1 Thess. 4:3-8; Gal. 5:16-21; Matt. 5:16; Phil. 1:27; 1 Pet. 2:11; Matt. 15:16).

After you do this, do one more thing. Look at the following questions. What conclusions do you come up with as you honestly answer these questions?

1. Why are there chaperons at dances? If the dance is not sexual in nature, why do you need chaperons? (Quotes from those who chaperoned a dance, “I got tired of moving hands back where they should be,” “I know for a fact I’m needed more after the kids leave the dance than in here. In the gym they just stimulate each other, later they are driven to fulfill those lusts.”)

2. Would Jesus dance? Would he be involved in sexual gyrations and movements? Would Jesus chaperon a dance?

3. Could you dance under the cross of your bleeding Savior?

4. If this dance is not “sexually” natured, then try having all the boys just dance with each other. There should be no problem if it does not have a sexual overtone, should there?

5. If dancing is OK, I think we should have one for the adults of this congregation. Would you like me to dance with your wife like we have described? If you attempt to dance with my wife, I’d give you a knuckle sandwich!

6. If the boys and girls do the same movements involved in this dance, without music, they would be in big, big trouble? Would you like your son or daughter to do these dance movements in a car?

Guardian of Truth XLI: 11 p. 18-20
June 5, 1997

By Daniel H. King Sr.

As we drive along the highways of our land, we are often confronted with alternate routes which we may take to get to where we wish to travel. Our choice, whether to go in one direction or the other, may take us to entirely different destinations, widely separated both as to geographical location and type of scenery we shall view, whether mountains, valleys, oceans, or deserts.

Life in general is very much the same as driving down the highway. When we encounter various choices in our lives, we too often pass them off as having little importance in terms of the direction of our existence or of the future, but very often they are monumental and even historic in terms of our own particular circumstances and eventual spiritual destination.

The Bible, in several places, grapples with this notion of making choices which critically touch upon the overall direction and bearing of the soul. What brings me to consider this matter is my recent rereading of the story of King Zedekiah and the people of Jerusalem during the days of the prophet Jeremiah. Israel was under attack from Nebuchadnezzar and the armies of Babylon. When the king sent to inquire of the prophet as to how he should proceed, in hopes that the Lord would be gracious and grant Jerusalem a reprieve from this malevolent man and his brutal armies, Jeremiah told the people to surrender. Now this was not what the king or his nobles wanted to hear! And you can imagine how traitorous it must have sounded for the prophet of God to make such a suggestion. But Jeremiah explained that there were only two directions to go here, and neither of them a very happy alternative, but one would at least save their lives.

After he had defined the two possibilities, the seer put the options in these terms: “Thus saith Jehovah: Behold, I set before you the way of life and the way of death” (Jer. 21:8). There was no middle ground, no third or more desirable choice. That was it. The prophet continued: “He that abideth in this city shall die by the sword, and by the famine, and by the pestilence; but he that goeth out, and passeth over to the Chaldeans that besiege you, he shall live, and his life shall be unto him for a prey. For I have set my face upon this city for evil, and not for good, saith Jehovah: it shall be given into the hand of the king of Babylon, and he shall burn it with fire” (Jer. 21:9-10).

The way of surrender is no more easy for us today than it was for them when Jeremiah set it before King Zedekiah and his princes. But it is the way of life, for us as it was for them. One cannot fight against God (Acts 5:39). How difficult it is to make this spiritual capitulation is illustrated in the conversion of Saul of Tarsus. On the Damascus road Jesus said to him, “I am Jesus whom thou persecutest: it is hard for thee to kick against the pricks” (Acts 9:5). Still later, he was three days without sight and did neither eat nor drink (v. 9) till finally Ananias came in to him and commanded him to be baptized: “And now why tarriest thou? arise, and be baptized, and wash away thy sins, calling on his name” (Acts 22:16). Spiritual surrender is ever a difficult choice to make, but it is the way of life!

Again, it is pictured in the record of a hardened jailor’s transformation, as told by Luke in Acts 16. At midnight he was roused from sleep by an earthquake which threw wide the doors of the prison and loosed the prisoner’s bonds. He drew his sword to take his own life, supposing that all the prisoners had escaped, but heard the voice of Paul from within, a voice which only a few moments before had caroled hymns of praise to God, telling him to do himself no harm, since none of the prisoners was gone. Calling for lights, he rushed into the chamber where only a while be-fore he had locked their feet fast in the stocks. He then fell down at their feet and asked what he needed to do to be saved (v. 30). He had surrendered! He had relinquished control to the Lord of his prisoners, Paul and Silas. He decided to travel the way of life.

The same thing is illustrated in the metamorphosis of those people who came to compose the church in Ephesus.

The city was the cult-center of the goddess Artemis, or Diana as the Romans called her. Her temple at Ephesus was so majestic that it was considered by first-century tourists to be one of the seven wonders of the ancient world. Much of the town’s economic and cultural life was bound up with that heathen deity, her mythology, priesthood, altar, and sacrifice. In A.D. 52 Paul the apostle traveled to the city and began to teach the people about Jesus Christ. After a notable miracle wrought by Paul, the response of these once-pagan citizens of Ephesus was overwhelming: “And this became known to all, both Jews and Greeks, that dwelt at Ephesus; and fear fell upon them all, and the name of the Lord Jesus was magnified. Many also of them that had believed came, confessing, and declaring their deeds. And not a few of them that practiced magi-cal arts brought their books together and burned them in the sight of all; and they counted the price of them, and found it fifty thousand pieces of silver. So mightily grew the word of the Lord and prevailed” (Acts 19:17-20). They had chosen to surrender, and along with that spiritual submission, they had decided to travel the way of life rather than the way of death.

“Behold, I set before you the way of life and the way of death,” the Lord told Zedekiah and his nobles. And the way of life was the way of surrender. It is no different today. In all these cases, and many more like them that could be marshaled from the pages of Holy Writ, men were forced to lay down their arms and relinquish control to him who makes his prisoners his willing slaves, then exalts them to glory. Let us also choose the way of life!

Guardian of Truth XLI: 11 p. 16-17
June 5, 1997

By Andy Alexander

The Lord’s appeal through the gospel is spiritual, while Satan’s appeal is through the flesh or carnal (Gal. 5:16-25; 1 John 2:15-17). In this article we want to notice some of the carnal appeals that Satan uses to keep people in darkness or lure Christians out of the light and back into his kingdom. These carnal appeals of Satan can be clearly seen among those in Ephesus who opposed the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Luke records the efforts and results of the apostle Paul and his companions in Ephesus as they carried out the commission of Jesus Christ (Acts 19). Paul preached the gospel of Christ and at the same time exposed the religious frauds that existed in that area of Asia Minor (Acts 19:1-17). A positive effect of Paul’s preaching in Ephesus was that people repented of their sins, turned to Christ, and the “Word of God grew mightily and prevailed” (Acts 19:18-20). A negative result was that those in error with hardened hearts refused to obey the gospel and sought to destroy the faith of those who did (Acts 19:21-41).

Several different carnal arguments were used in an effort to hinder or destroy the success of the gospel in Ephesus. Let’s notice these various carnal appeals and some examples in our day of the exact same appeals made by Satan. Awareness of these fleshly appeals should help us avoid these deadly traps of Satan.

Wealth

Wealth was used by Satan to blind the eyes of those in Ephesus. “Demetrius, a silversmith, who made silver shrines of Diana” recognized that the gospel could destroy his prosperity (Acts 19:24-25). He stirred up others of his trade and created much confusion. Why would Demetrius not want to obey the truth? Money! Wealth! Materialism! These were his gods and he was not going to give them up for the truth.

Pocketbook religion is all the religion that Demetrius knew and many today follow that same god. They check their pocketbook first and if it going to cost them some-thing financially to serve the Lord, they are not willing to do it.

This carnal appeal is made by many denominational churches today. They preach a gospel of health and wealth. They claim that if you give, give, and give more to their false religion, that you will receive back more in material goods than you gave originally. It sounds good, but the root of the appeal is carnality and its not the appeal of the Spirit.

Successful Religion

Success of the religion was another avenue used by Satan to keep people trapped in false religion. In his effort to create confusion and win supporters, Demetrius said, “so not only is this trade of ours in danger of falling into disrepute, but also the temple of the great goddess Diana may be despised and her magnificence destroyed, whom all Asia and the world worship” (Acts 19:27). What if all Asia and the whole world worshiped the goddess Diana? Would that prove the religion true? Can truth be determined by counting heads?

There are many people in our day who believe like Demetrius. They gather in their religious conventions, councils, or synods and vote on various Bible doctrines, as if a majority vote will change God’s will. The Psalmist said concerning the permanent nature of God’s Word, “For ever, 0 Jehovah, Thy word is settled in heaven” (Ps. 119:89). Some denominational bodies have voiced their approval of homosexuality, abortion, and other sins, but their vote, even if unanimous, cannot change the mind of God.

The appeal of some denominations is to their worldwide success. The Jehovah’s Witnesses denomination points to their world headquarters with pride. When questioned about various aspects of their doctrine that are contrary to the doctrine of Christ, they frequently point to their worldwide success as proof that their erroneous doctrine is acceptable with God. They say something like, “We couldn’t be world-wide if God wasn’t with us” or “Our great success proves that God is with us.” These things do not prove any such thing. What would an appeal to numbers have proved in Noah’s day? Being in the majority in Sodom and Gomorrah carried no weight with God (Gen. 19).

If success or being in the majority was equivalent to having the truth, then we should look for the largest religious sect and join with them. That would make Catholics, Hindus, Muslims, or something else out of all of us. This likely would not appeal to many who use success as a measure of truth.

Emotionalism

Emotionalism is another ploy used by Satan. There is a place in the gospel for emotion. When we learn that Jesus went to the cross and died for our sins, our emotions ought to be affected. We hear the preaching of the cross, become convicted of sins, and obey the gospel for the forgiveness of those sins, our hearts should rejoice. This is the order found in the New Testament. People heard the gospel, responded to the gospel by confessing their faith in Jesus, repenting of their sins, and being baptized for the forgiveness of sins, then rejoiced at the fact that they were new creatures in Christ (Acts 8:35-39; 2:36-42). Emotion follows the understanding. This is the pattern of truth.

Satan uses emotions to override the understanding. People swayed by their emotions instead of the truth will be stirred to the point of ignoring the truth for a “better felt than told” feeling. Assemblies of this sort are often full of confusion and commotion, with little, if any, Bible instruction taking place.

In Ephesus, the city was filled with confusion and a crowd gathered in the local theater. A man by the name of Alexander wanted to make a reasoned defense of Christianity, but when it was discovered that he was a Jew “all with one voice cried out for about two hours, `Great is Diana of the Ephesians”‘ (Acts 19:34). Keep the people confused so that they cannot hear and understand the truth is a tactic that works well for Satan. The people’s ability to stop, think, and examine what they believe is overruled by their emotions.

God teaches us to study, learn, and obey his will (2 Tim. 2:15; Acts 17:11; Matt. 11:28-30; 7:21). The assemblies of the churches of Christ in the first century were to be conducted decently and in order (1 Cor. 14:40). The members of the congregation should be edified and they should be able to understand in such a way that they may be able to say “amen” to the prayers that are offered unto God (1 Cor. 14:26, 16). Visitors to their assemblies should also be able to understand the Word of God (1 Cor. 14:23-25).

The holiness, charismatic Pentecostal groups of our day conduct services where confusion reigns supreme. Prayers are uttered and everyone begins to mumble aloud so that nothing can be understood and no true “amen” could be said. It is nothing more than confusion being carried on in the name of the Lord. Studying the truth, learning the difference between right and wrong, and examining the Word of God is far removed from these assemblies. The whole atmosphere is geared toward entertainment and not true worship unto God.

Tradition

Tradition is also used by Satan to prevent people from responding in a positive way to the truth. Satan could not make his appeal to truth, but he could appeal to what the people had always believed. The city clerk of Ephesus made a statement to the crowd in the theater after he had quieted them. He said, “Men of Ephesus, what man is there who does not know that the city of the Ephesians is temple guardian of the great goddess Diana, and of the image which fell down from Zeus?” Implied in this statement is the idea that Diana has been worshiped for years in Ephesus and any religion that has been around as long this one could not be wrong. “We have always believed in Diana and we always will” is the appeal to traditionalism.

The fact that someone has always believed something to be true does not make it true. For centuries many scientists believed the world to be flat. Did this long-standing belief or tradition make it flat?

This attitude is alive today. The Catholic Church, the Episcopal Church, and many mainstream denominations are built around what their forefathers believed. It matters not to them that the truth condemns their practices (Col. 3:17). Infant baptism, sprinkling substituted for immersion, Christmas and Easter observances, and instrumental music are just a few of their traditions that are completely foreign to the Scriptural worship and practice of the New Testament church. Jesus said of the traditionalists of his day, “And in vain do they worship Me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men” (Matt. 15:9).

Conclusion

These tactics, wealth, success, emotionalism, and traditionalism, are effective tools of Satan. He will use these individually or he will combine them to make them more appealing. He will thread them together to make them appear stronger, but these false appeals cannot stand up to the power of the gospel. Let’s be aware of these carnal appeals and not succumb to the temptation to use these appeals in-stead of the gospel of Jesus which is “the power of God unto salvation” (Rom. 1:16).

Guardian of Truth XLI: 11 p. 14-15
June 5, 1997

By Tom Hamilton

More and more we hear about the modern trend of “home schooling.” By this term one normally refers to the instruction of academic subjects at home, as opposed to a private or public school, but let us consider the term differently. True “home schooling” is as old as the first home and has always been God’s intention for his people in every time period. The home has always been the primary schoolroom of life. It is here that we first learn about a world larger than ourselves, the purpose of that world and our role in it, and all the necessary values for functioning in that world, such as respect for authority, respect for other people, and service. It is in the home that we learn about relationships.

This fundamental place of the home in God’s plan is illustrated by the pivotal fifth commandment to honor your father and your mother (Exod. 20:12; Deut. 5:16). On the one hand, we demonstrate how well we have learned in the home the principle of respect for authority, and we show whether we can transfer that respect to God’s authority in obeying the first four commandments. On the other hand, we demonstrate how well we have learned in the home the principle of respect for other people, and we show whether we can transfer that respect to those beyond our family in obeying the last five commandments.

In order for the family relationship to function healthfully and to serve as our primary schoolroom as God intended, each party to the relation-ship must fulfill his obligations to the other. And just what is it that parents owe their children? Nothing more, nothing less, and nothing other than to teach and train them. On the other hand, what is it that children owe their parents? Nothing more, nothing less, and nothing other than to learn, obey, and respect. If the home is to fundamentally be as God designed it, parents must train the children and children must honor the parents!

If a father trains his child properly, the appropriate response by the child will be one of honor, as Proverbs 22:16 describes this general principle. But in order to evoke this desired response of honor, fathers must apply their best effort in three areas:

1. Action. To successfully be a father, we must actually spend the time necessary to teach and train the child. This on-going work fills every moment of every day, without stopping until the child is grown (Deut. 6:6-9). Because “father” is biblically defined as actually doing this training, our children are fatherless or illegitimate when we do not train them (Heb. 12:7-n). Biological relation is meaningless; spiritual training is crucial.

2. Aptitude. For a father to provide the training his child needs, the father must actually possess the knowledge himself. One cannot teach another that which he himself does not know. And this training is more than academic, physical, or social. While these things are necessary, they are merely part of the greater training in which we must give the child a spiritual training that embraces all that the child must know in order to function in this world as God intends for him. Therefore, fathers must devote themselves to spiritual wisdom and maturity in order to capably pass it on to their children (Deut. 6:1-9). It is such wisdom that compels us to do what is best for our child spiritually, instead of succumbing to the natural desire to let our child have or do anything he wants.

3. Attitude. Genuine parenting is done out of selfless love for the child. But it needs to be a love which is communicated to the child in all that we do, for unexpressed love is meaningless to the one on the receiving end. Even in our disciplining, we must be careful to demonstrate that it is because of our love for the child (Heb. 12:5-11). It is this same loving attitude that prevents the father from driving his children into resentment or destroying their spirit (Eph. 6:4; Col. 3:21). The biblical picture of fatherhood is not that of a brutal, demanding tyrant, but one who exhorts, encourages, and implores (1 Thess. 2:11).

Indeed, worthy of honor is the father who displays spiritual wisdom in his own life, who demonstrates a sacrificial effort to do what is best for his child, and who exhorts and encourages his child in genuine compassion. To the extent that these qualities are obvious to the child, the appropriate response will be honor, which manifests itself in three ways:

1. Obedience. When Paul instructs children to “obey your parents in the Lord,” he cites the fifth commandment as his proof-text (Eph. 6:1-3), equating obedience with honor. Obedience is a fundamental part of both the relationship of the family and the learning experience which

God intends to take place there. Unfortunately, too many parents omit this essential ingredient. They try to be a “friend” with the child which they hope will lead to “cooperation.” But the parent relationship cannot exist without obedience first, and without obedience, the child is incapable of learning about authority or genuine respect for others. This is why the word translated “disobedient to parents” is always found listed among the most abominable and destructive of sins. In Romans 1:28-32, we read that such depravity as disobedience to parents is worthy of death. In 2 Timothy 3:1-5, Paul describes those who are disobedient to parents as incapable of loving God or anyone else besides themselves.

We must appreciate that disobedience is a serious problem, not usually because of the act itself, but because of the lack of respect which it indicates and the corrupted condition of the child’s heart which it reflects. If a three year-old sticks his tongue out at his father and yells “No!” to his commands, nobody will die and no property is destroyed. Because of a “no-harm-done” attitude, too many fathers let such episodes pass without requiring obedience and respect. But this superficial perspective fails to appreciate what the father is really teaching the child, what the child is learning as the real rules of life, and what immense harm is taking place in front of the father’s eyes. Indeed, his child is being killed spiritually one act of disrespect at a time, and the father’s most precious possession of a young, innocent soul is being destroyed.

2. Gratitude. As the child matures, so does his honor and the means in which it manifests itself. If the child develops properly, his respect also develops into an understanding and genuine appreciation for what his parents are doing for him. The mindless obedience of childhood is replaced by a more mature and perceptive obedience. Even the negative aspects of training and discipline, which at the moment seem joyless, are upon later reflection viewed in gratitude (Heb. 12:5-11). The most poignant moment of such realization and gratitude probably arrives at the time when our children have their own children. It is both the most likely and the most meaningful moment when your children will rise up and call you “blessed” (Prov. 31:28), whether you are a worthy woman or a worthy father.

3. Selfless Love. Of course, the ultimate goal of the spiritual training of our children is the attainment of a sacrificial, selfless life of service toward God and other people. If the child continues to develop properly, this maturity of genuine selflessness will be attained. The father and the child may then enjoy a complete and mature relationship in which the sheer enjoyment of that relationship is its own reward. As parents, we need no longer concern ourselves with motivating our children to obedience by threats or material rewards  the more mature motivation of a de-sire to please the other is what drives our children’s obedience, respect, and honor.

Even after the children have left the home, this respect and honor will remain. In the parents’ old age, this selfless love will manifest itself in caring for one’s aged parents, as Jesus himself applied the fifth commandment to this situation (Mark 7:6-13). It is not that the fifth commandment may be reduced to the simple act of physically caring for one’s parents. Jesus is pointing out that genuine respect and selfless love require this and much more. As one’s parents get older, perhaps reverting back more and more to a childlike state of helplessness, the grown child has an opportunity to demonstrate to his parents how well he learned what they had demonstrated to him.

Indeed, the home is the schoolroom of relationships, and we should ask how well we have learned honor toward our own parents, God, and other people. To what extent have we learned obedience, gratitude, and self-less love?

Guardian of Truth XLI: 12 p. 3-5
June 19, 1997