Truth Magazine

Is marriage important? How you answer that question has everything to do with how you approach marriage, commitment to it, and even divorce. In that marriage is a divine institution, it goes without saying that it is important. Another obvious fact is that the world’s view of marriage continues to decline.

The Sunday Tennessean (June 6, 1999) had an article on the front page entitled, “Importance of marriage declines.” The article stated:

Divorce has become so common in Tennessee that almost two- thirds of all new marriages involve either a divorced bride or groom, and 38% of weddings are between two divorced persons, a new study shows.

The report released by the conservative Tennessee Family Institute, is based on marriage data from the past 20 years.

Research analyst Roger Abram- son, who wrote the report, said the numbers reflect a societal shift toward placing less importance on the institution of marriage.

The institution of marriage generally is in a weaker state now than it was (20 years ago) because people don’t view marriage as the commitment they once did,” Abramson said. “We now have a state with a significant group of people where families are torn apart for no other reason than they just want to. . . . But information from the National Center for Health Statistics has for years been used to predict that about half of new marriages will end in divorce.

Tennessee’s divorce rate of 6.3 per 1,000 people is the eighth-highest rate in the country, according to an NCHS study, and state statistics show a growing number of Tennesseans are getting married for their fifth and sixth time.

The attitudes reflected in these studies affect God’s people too. We live in a world that shapes and molds the weaker ones to be like it (Rom. 12:1-3). Thus, it  behooves us to continually teach about the importance of marriage.

Marriage Was Created By God

Marriage is not a creation of man- kind, but of God himself. In the very beginning God saw that it was not good that man should be alone and he thus said, “I will make him a helper comparable to him” (Gen. 2:18). So, God created Eve from his rib and said, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (v. 24).This principle, stated in the garden, was quoted by Paul (Eph. 5:31) and Jesus himself (Matt. 19:4-6) when teaching on marriage.

This institution, called marriage, was planned and designed by God. Being the author of it, God set the laws that are to govern this relation- ship (Gen. 2:24; Rom. 7:2-3).

The Purpose of Marriage

The importance of marriage is clearly seen when we understand why God created it. What is the purpose of marriage?

1. Companionship. When God saw that it was not good that man should be alone, he made a wife for him (Gen. 2:18-24).

2. Legitimately bearing children. It is possible to have children without the honor of marriage. However, to do so involves sin. When God created marriage in the beginning he said, “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply’” (Gen. 1:27-28).

Paul said, “Therefore I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully” (1 Tim. 5:14).

3. For sexual relations — to avoid fornication. Lest man behave as an animal and seek to fulfill his desire with any who would be willing, he designed marriage for the lawful sexual union. Paul wrote to the Corinthians,

Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does (1 Cor. 7:2-4).

The same apostle wrote to the He- brews saying, “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (Heb. 13:4).

Marriage is not important if . . . There are several ways that one may not honor marriage as God intended. Marriage is not important if   . . .

1. There is sex before marriage. Premarital sex is not uncommon.

Earlier in this decade the Tennessean reported that 63% of today’s teenagers see nothing morally wrong with sexual relations before marriage. That’s scary! That means that 63% of the people our teenagers associate with see nothing wrong with sex before marriage.

The Hebrew writer said that the marriage bed (sexual relations in marriage) is undefiled. However, the fornicator (pre-marital) and the adulterer (extra-marital) God will condemn (Heb. 13:4). Those who commit fornication, not only violate an emphatic prohibition, but have no respect for marriage.

2. Adultery is committed. When a married person goes outside the realm of marriage for sexual relation, his marriage is not important to him at all. We have already noted that Hebrews 13:4 says God will condemn such a person. Jesus taught that this unfaithful act gives the innocent party the right to put his mate away and remarry another (Matt. 5:32; 19:9).

3. One divorces without a scriptural right. When asked if a man could divorce his wife without a cause, Jesus responded with four reasons why the answer was “no” (Matt. 19:3-6). Paul taught the same in 1 Corinthians 7:10-13. Jesus gave only one scriptural cause for divorce: fornication (Matt. 5:32; 19:9). When a person divorces for any other cause, he does not honor marriage or God’s law.

4. One remarries without a scriptural right. Jesus said, “And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery” (Matt. 19:9). The only one who has a right to remarry (in the case of divorce) is one who has put his mate away for the cause of fornication. All others commit adultery when they remarry.

The strictness of God’s law tells us that he views marriage as important. If his law would allow divorce for any cause or remarriage in any divorce, it would indicate a lesser view of marriage. The very article we cited above suggest that frivolous divorce and remarriage is a sign that marriage is not important.

5. You are not the mate you ought to be. It is not only those who commit fornication or divorce who view marriage as unimportant. Those who stay together and are never unfaithful to their mate could be guilty too. Those who do not work at making their marriage the best it can be, do not think marriage is important. If it is, they would change!

Husbands who view marriage as important seek to love their wives as themselves (Eph. 5:22-28), be understanding, honor his wife and treat her as the weaker vessel (1 Pet. 3:7). Wives who think marriage is important strive to love their husbands (Tit. 2:5), be submissive (1 Pet. 3:1-6), and have reverence for their husbands (Eph. 5:33).

We know marriage is important to God. We know that marriage is not important to the world. How do you view marriage?

The above question is a hard one to ask because it requires us to look at ourselves and see if we are doing something wrong. We have to find the reason why once faithful young people are turning away from the Lord’s church in greater and greater numbers.

So, why are the young people leaving? Is it because they are not taught the way they should live? In some cases that is true, you can look at the lives of the parents and see that spiritual things were not first in their lives and hence it is not first in the lives of their children. If this is the case, both parents and children need to remember that we are to seek the kingdom of God first (Matt. 6:33). No matter what others are doing around us, we are to follow Christ.

However, that is not always the case. There are children who turn away from the truth even though their parents have never faltered once. What is the cause for them turning away? An unloving environment has been the cause of some turning away. They feel as if their fellow brothers and sisters in Christ couldn’t care less about them. Sadly, the only time some Christians are caring is after someone has left the church. We, as Christians, need to make sure that we show concern and caring about our fellow Christians. We need to get to know one another. Remember, we are commanded to “rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep” (Rom. 12:15). We can’t do that if we don’t know one another.

In 1 Timothy 4:12, Paul told Timothy, “Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity.” I am not so far removed from being a young person that I can’t remember the feeling of someone despising my youth, making me feel as if my ideas were the dumbest thing they had ever heard in their life. Older Christians can get so set in their ways that they will not move an inch. I am not talking about doctrinal issues. I am the first to be unmoved when someone wants to go against the word of God. What I am speaking of are matters of opinion, where we have choices. I have all but been told that I should keep my mouth shut because I was a “babe in

Christ. ”I have heard people use the term “Young Christian” with such a tone you would think they were saying the worst two words ever spoken. All Christians should show respect to other Christians, no matter what age they are or how long they have been Christians.

These are by no means all the reasons why young people leave the church. However, they are some of the top reasons I have heard from those who have left.

Each member of the Lord’s church need to take a long, hard look at himself and see if he is the person that is trying to keep the young people in the church or is he one who is running them off.

The Mediterranean has dominated Israel’s life and civilization throughout the ages. Most of Israel’s wealth comes from this busy, densely populated strip near Tel Aviv and from the farms of the well-watered Sharon plain, running north to south just inland from the sea. Tel Aviv is a modern city, less than 100 years old. Over one million people live within the boundaries of greater Tel Aviv, but before 1909 this area was a wasteland, a barren stretch of sand.

Jaffa (Joppa)

The word “Jaffa” is derived from the Hebrew word yapo that means “pretty or lovely.” Modern Jaffa conveys little sense of its long history. The earliest remains here date back to the 18th century B.C. In the 12th century B.C., Jaffa became part of the Israelite kingdom, and the Old Testament makes mention of the town several times. Under Solomon it was developed as the principal port for the Jewish capital, Jerusalem.

Here are some biblical  events and facts that are related to Joppa.

The city was in the territory of the tribe of Dan when the Land was divided under Joshua (see map of the Twelve Tribes of Israel).

David conquered the area during his reign when he took control of land occupied by the Philistines (the area from Joppa to Gaza).

Solomon used the city as a port city for receiving cedars from Hiram, king of Tyre (2 Chron. 2:16). It was an harbor in the times of Ezra (3:7). Therefore, Jaffa was the port city for Jerusalem some 35 miles away. In New Testament times, Jaffa has been replaced as the major port by Caesarea on the coast, which was constructed by Herod the Great.

Jonah fled through Joppa toward Tarshish (Jon. 1:3). There Jonah boarded a boat headed to Tarshish, leading to his being swallowed by a great fish.

It was conquered by Herod the Great (37-4 B.C.).

It was destroyed by Vespaian in the overthrow of the Jewish rebellion leading to the destruction of Jerusalem in A.D. 70.

Peter raised Dorcas from the dead (Acts 9:36-42).

Peter was living with Simon the tanner beside the sea (Acts 9:43) when servants from the house of Cornelius came to him from Caesarea (about 30 miles north). There he had his vision of the sheet let down from heaven full of clean and unclean items (Acts 10).

The 12th and 13th centuries A.D. saw frequent invasions as successive Crusaders, including Richard the Lion-hearted, were beaten off. From that time until the British entered Jaffa in November 1917, Jaffa was Arab. By the start of the 20th century, a few Jewish refugees had settled among the Arabs of Jaffa. Jaffa is the oldest still-functioning seaport in the world.

The 1947 U.N. Partition Plan placed Jaffa in an Arab state, and Tel Aviv in a Jewish one. Following the 1948 Proclamation of the State of Israel, Jaffa’s Arabs launched a full-scale military attack on Tel-Aviv. They were defeated and many fled. Today only a small number of residents are Arab. The community is a lovely community with a beautiful view of the Mediterranean Sea in the site traditionally said to be where Peter raised Dorcas.

It was a beautiful Sunday in summer. The drive out to the little country church building was pleasant but uneventful. Skies were blue, the grass and trees were a bright green. Horses and cows were in the meadows. And birds were singing in the trees. In those days no one had air-conditioning in their cars. We drove a little slower with the windows down and the sights, sounds, and smells added to the joy of the morning.

There was nothing much unusual about the service. We always had to wait ten or fifteen minutes past starting time. It was customary to wait till all the straggling “regulars” got there.

As usual I had the “scripture reading,” led the opening prayer, preached the sermon, “waited at the table” and finally offered the closing prayer. The brethren were fine, good people, but the men were most reluctant to participate much in public worship. Some brethren in those days would come right out and say, “We got brother                comin’ down to hold services for us. ”That meant I led every public act except the song service. They knew better than to ask me to lead singing!

After services we were invited to take lunch with a very hospitable older couple. Much preparation for the meal had been done either the day before or that morning before services. In just a few minutes we found ourselves surrounding a very delightful meal. There was an abundant supply of vegetables, at least two meats and homemade bread. And then we all finished up on cobbler, pie, or cake.

As everyone finished their meal, my wife and the lady of the house began to clear the table. When our good hostess returned from the kitchen, she went around the table pouring all the leftover tea from all of our glasses back into the tea pitcher! With that she held up the pitcher and with some satisfaction declared, “Oh good, we have enough tea left over for supper”!

Suffice it to say, that evening my wife and I both decided that just a glass of water would taste good. We