by Corey Willis
Synopsis: Perceptive Christians will avoid, not only overt acts of sexual immorality, but things that tend to produce lust.
In C.S. Lewis' satirical, fictional narrative, The Screwtape Letters, we encounter two demons discussing how best to overtake men in sin. The senior demon, Screwtape, mentors his nephew, writing, "(God) made the pleasures: all our research so far has not enabled us to produce one. All we can do is to encourage the humans to take the pleasures which our Enemy has produced, at times, or in ways, or in degrees, which He has forbidden." Satan has learned how to twist and manipulate God's good gifts to man to lure him into temporary pleasure and eternal destruction.
Nowhere is this more evident than with the wholesome sexual pleasures that God intended between a man and his wife. Even those who refuse to "go all the way" into fornication will toe the line with activities that stir or even gratify their sexual desires. Solomon rhetorically asks, "Can a man carry fire next to his chest and his clothes not be burned?" (Prov. 6:27). Kindling sexual desires outside of the marriage relationship lights a sinful fire that will consume us.
Let's identify what we mean in speaking of sexually suggestive activities, understand the underlying temptations, and consider the long-term effects. Then we can learn how to avoid or turn from them.
Any activity intended to stir up or fulfill/gratify sexual desires is sexually suggestive. Although it stops short of the physical act of porneia, translated "fornication," it would stir up the passions that lead to it. In Galatians 5:19ff, Paul refers to such activities as "lasciviousness," defined as "unrestrained sexual behavior" or lustfulness," "a lustful or lewd quality," and "the quality of arousing sexual desire" (Dictionary.com).
It's not just sexual touches, movements, and dancing that stir up desires and thoughts. Immodest clothing is also sexually suggestive. It stirs our sexual desire, regardless of what the individual wearing it may have intended. What's ironic to me is that some Christians don't understand this, but Facebook does. In their Advertising Policies, they prohibit "sexually suggestive content" citing several examples: "excessive visible skin or cleavage, even if not explicitly sexual in nature" and "images focused on individual body parts, such as abs, buttocks or chest, even if not explicitly sexual in nature" (Facebook, 2020). They understand that such content arouses sexual desire. When women wear tight clothing that emphasizes their buttocks or breasts, Facebook understands it to be suggestive.
The same is true of conversations and messages that include sexual innuendos or allude to sexual activity, whether covertly or overtly. Young people of all ages are engaging in "sexting" and even sending/receiving "nudes," naked pictures of themselves. Regardless of consent, all of these activities amount to the kind of lasciviousness that God has condemned.
Pornography stirs up and gratifies sexual desires. At one time, access to such was limited by physical location and public shame, but Satan has long since removed those barriers. From the youngest to the oldest, the smartphone is ubiquitous. If not a phone, an internet-connected tablet or portable device is within arm's reach. Each device is capable of anonymous access to free and abundant pornographic images and videos. Our culture is sending the clear message that this is part of normal "sexual health," but God identifies it as lascivious behavior.
If we're going to escape temptation, we need to understand how Satan attempts to pull us in through lust. The obvious appeals are to the eyes and flesh (1 John 2:16), the sexual desires themselves. God intended men and women to gratify these desires within the marital relationship fully. Solomon instructed husbands to "rejoice in the wife of your youth," "be intoxicated always in her love," and "delight" in that shared sexual relationship (Prov. 5:18-19, ESV). However, Satan's temptation is that these desires can be gratified outside of marriage's covenant relationship. He wants you to believe it is acceptable to fulfill these desires with someone you "love," although you aren't married. Satan wants to convince you that a relationship isn't even necessary to satisfy sexual desires, that it's just a fleshly need like food or water. That's Satan's lie! God's design for life is, "Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled" (Heb. 13:4).
There is also a "rush" associated with secrecy and doing forbidden things. This is the "pride of life" that John tells us about (1 John 2:16). Knowing something that no one else knows or doing things you're not supposed to do provides a jolt of excitement and adrenaline: "Stolen water is sweet, and bread eaten in secret is pleasant" (Prov. 9:17). It was the appeal of the "strange woman" in Proverbs 7 when she told the young man, "My husband is not at home; he has gone on a long journey . . . at full moon, he will come home" (19-20). Satan wants you to think, "It'll be our secret; no one will know." Yet, God knows even those things you do when no one else is looking. Of God, the psalmist asked rhetorically, "Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence?" He writes, "even the darkness is not dark to you. . . for darkness is as light with you" (Psa. 139:7,11-12). Though Satan offers the rush of secrecy, God sees it all.
Unlike God's design for the marriage, Satan's lust is insatiable. We understand this truth as it applies to money. How much is enough? Of course, it's never enough for the man who lusts for wealth (Eccl. 4:8; 5:10; 6:7; 1 Tim. 6:10). The same is true of sexually suggestive activities. Not even the act of fornication itself satisfies these lusts. Consider the case of Amnon, who was "tormented" with desire for his half-sister, Tamar (2 Sam. 13). Once he had sinfully violated her, was he satisfied? No, he hated her with a greater passion than his former lust (13:15). There's a progression of lust that often starts with a circumstantial encounter but piques the curiosity and awakens sexual desire. At this point, the individual is faced with the choice to suppress curiosity or explore it with intent. This is what happened with David. By happenstance, he saw Bathsheba while she was bathing but later inquired about her, sent for her, and lay with her (2 Sam 11:3-4). Satan seeks to monopolize his victim's thoughts and stir up a progressively insatiable desire.
Although Satan wants us to believe that these are innocent and natural behaviors, God shows us that these unchecked passions lead man to utter depravity. Read Romans 1:24-32 and see how lusting after these things leads to absolute sinfulness. Lust turns natural desire into unnatural passions and shameful acts. It leads to a debased mind and every kind of unrighteousness that destroys the heart and utterly defiles the man from within (Mark 7:15-23; Ps. 23:7). Step by step, man hardens his heart against God, the only grace that can save him.
We now understand Paul's earnest admonition to Timothy to "flee youthful passion" and keep his heart pure (2 Tim. 2:22). One's life will reflect the purity of his heart, so we must be vigilant to maintain it (Prov. 4:23). How can we accomplish this goal?
First and foremost, if you've not become a Christian, you cannot be pure of heart. One's heart is only cleansed by following Christ in faithful obedience. God, who created you and knows your heart, can cleanse it by faith (Acts 15:8-9). Obedience is proof of that faith and the method by which your soul is purified before Him (1 Pet. 1:22). If you haven't allowed God to cleanse your heart, for what are you waiting?
The Lord assures us that we can control our desires. He tells us that if we "walk by the Spirit," we won't fall victim to gratify the desires of the flesh (Gal. 5:16-25). The Spirit revealed the mind and will of God to us in the Bible. Walking in the Spirit is following the guidance of His word and living within its commandments and principles. The God who created you knows how to give you the most fulfilling life. Like Job, we need to make a "covenant with (our) eyes" not to look at a woman to lust after her (Job 31:1). As Christians, we need to talk with each other about our struggles with Satan. There's no shame in being tempted, but how do we subsequently respond? We need to seek counsel from and walk with those who are wise (Prov.13:20).
Becoming a Christian doesn't make you immune to temptation and sin. From God's vantage point, when we fall back into the sins of our former life, it's like watching a dog vomit and turn right back around and eat it (2 Pet. 2:20-22). You know how awful the sin is; you know the price paid to redeem you, yet you fill yourself with it again. Nevertheless, God is gracious! He allows us to repent and ask for forgiveness (Acts 8:22). You can become pure in heart, control your desires, and enjoy the wholesome pleasures as God intended in this life.
"Lasciviousness." Dictionary.com. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/lasciviousness
"Advertising Policies: Adult Content." Facebook.com. https://www.facebook.com/policies/ads/prohibited_content/adult_content
Lewis, Clive Staples. The Screwtape Letters. United States: Macmillan, 1943. https://www.google.com/books/edition/_/9zoPAQAAIAAJ
