by Phillip E. Stuckey
Synopsis: Speaking from personal experience, Philip reminds us that "Dealing with Unexpected Illness" may be difficult and demanding, but provides opportunities for spiritual growth and service as we face such trials with God's help.
In 2009, while we were raising three young children, ages four, six, and nine, my wife, Elizabeth, was diagnosed with stage-three Non-Hodgins Follicular Lymphoma. After several batteries of tests, she was referred to the Winship Cancer Institute in Atlanta (part of the Emory Healthcare network) to participate in a clinical trial. We were in shock. We could not believe that this was happening to her and our family. What would we do? How would we cope? How would our children cope? Would she survive? How could this happen to us!?
Many of us can relate to what Solomon wrote, "Rejoice, O young man, in your youth, and let your heart cheer you in the days of your youth" (Eccl. 11:9). As young people, and then as young families, we often expect to be healthy and not to encounter any major illnesses. We convince ourselves that it only happens to older people (Eccl. 12:1-7). What do you do if you are suddenly faced with an unexpected illness, one that is life-changing, or even life-threatening?
All of us are going to face challenges and trials in this life. When those times come, only God has the power and the wisdom to guide us through them. When those times come, your faith is tested. When cancer struck our family, we had built up a strong faith in God and Christ. We had established a close relationship with our brethren.
Before the storm strikes, devote yourself to loving God with all your heart. Draw closer to Him through study and prayer. Develop a stronger faith in Him and a deeper love and appreciation for what He has done for you and what He has promised to do for you in Christ (Rom. 5:8; 8:31-32). Build better relationships with your brethren. If you continually build up and strengthen your faith and your relationships with God and with His people before the storms of life assail you, you will be prepared, because you will have built your foundation on the rock. You will not be moved or shaken by subsequent storms (Matt. 7:24-27).
One of the pitfalls of being young is believing you will live forever. It is easy to take everything for granted, like time with your spouse and with your kids. It seems that you will always have tomorrow, but we do not know what tomorrow will bring. God teaches us that life is only a vapor (Jas. 4:13-15). The Lord could return at any time; our lives could end at any time.
Embracing the brevity of life helps you embrace the urgency of the moment and appreciate everything God gives you. After my wife's diagnosis, we got in the habit of reminding one another, "Don't give cancer this moment. Don't give cancer this day." Take advantage of every moment you have. Don't leave the house without that hug or kiss. Every day, take the time you have been given with your spouse and children to do the most good you can for them, for God, and for others.
Sometimes, however, you struggle to live in the moment. You may suffer from anxiety and depression. Illness and treatments can make you weak and make you want to give up. You wonder if life will ever be the same again. Will it ever be normal again? There have been days like that in our house, too.
In times like these, you must learn to look beyond the moment. We need to remember that no suffering in this life lasts forever, and especially for the Christian. For us, every day brings hope for a better day tomorrow, even if this life comes to an end (Phil. 1:21; 2 Cor. 5:1-10). Even when you are ill, you can serve others. In the hospital, Beth asked her nurses about what was happening in their lives. You can still show concern and love for others and pray for others. You teach others by how you face your illness. Focusing on others instead of your suffering can help you look beyond the moment.
Paul once wrote of a deadly peril he experienced in Asia. Seeing a purpose to it made him rely on God and not himself (2 Cor. 1:8-10). When things are going well, it is easy to become comfortable and complacent. We rejoice in the good health and the good blessings that God has given, and we can easily become confident that we have everything under control. We take our health and prosperity for granted. Then tragedy strikes, and we realize that we do not have everything under control. Recognizing our helplessness, we better realize that we need God every day and every hour.
One of the greatest blessings we experienced from Beth's cancer was learning to rely on God more. You learn to appreciate how much He loves and cares for you. Beth's illness brought a newfound appreciation to Peter's instructions to cast all your cares on God because He cares for you (1 Pet. 5:6-7). You learn to pray to Him like you never prayed before. The fervent prayers and weeping of Hannah, David, Hezekiah, Jesus, and others, take on new meaning when you are brought to the place where you realize that no doctor, no medicine, no one but God can help you (1 Sam. 1:5-10; 2 Sam. 12:16-17; 2 Kings 20:1-5). You learn to lean on God and draw on His strength like you never did before (Eph. 6:10). God provides comfort through His word and through prayer. God provides comfort through the love and support of His people (1 Cor. 12:26; Rom. 12:15; 2 Cor. 1:3-4). We have been, and continue to be, overwhelmed by God's love and care and by the love His people show when someone is experiencing trials, whether it is illness, or some other trial.
During that first bout, Beth's cancer went into spontaneous regression. We rejoiced! We wept! We praised God! We were so happy that she had been spared. We were so happy that our children would have their mother healthy and whole again. Times like that make it easy to be grateful and to thank God.
However, what about those dark days since cancer returned this past year? What about the ups and downs of our journey with cancer—those days of enduring biopsies, scans, and blood work, and anxiously waiting for the results? Those are hard days, but my wife's unexpected illness has brought us closer to God, increasing our reliance on Him, strengthening our faith. No wonder James said to count it all joy when we are faced with trials (James 1:2-4). Like Job, we learned to thank God for the blessings and the trials (Job 1:20-21). It is easy to thank God when things are well, but not so easy when things are difficult.
Today we are once again experiencing God's grace during trial. God is comforting us again through His word and through our prayers and the prayers of His saints. He is comforting us again through the love and care of His people. Beth's prognosis is good; she is undergoing treatment and is doing well. Let us remember, unexpected illness can happen to anyone. None of us is guaranteed a life free from trial or struggle. Thanks be to God that He can turn the darkest hour into light. He can turn suffering into a blessing if we will only trust Him and walk with Him. May God help us to rely on Him and trust Him in good times and bad.
Author Bio: Phillip and Elizabeth labor with the Robison St. church of Christ in Edna, Texas. The church website is ednachurchofchrist.org. He can be reached at philstuckey@gmail.com.
